The Alliance: New Filthy Lie Assignment: Evil Glenn’s Christmas
My ’sources’ tell me evil Glenn will be Elf Skeeting. Should his supply of elves be lacking, he will, of course settle on puppy skeet. I’m certain it is less satisfying than his puppy smoothies…but satisfying to his coal black heart nonetheless.
Got this in an email, no source, but funny:
At a small airport terminal in Texas, three strangers awaiting their shuttle flight start conversing about the recent worldly events. The strangers were of varying cultures. One was Native American. Another was a cowboy from West Texas. The other person was a devout Arab Muslim.During their conversation, they began to discuss their cultural history. The Native American stated “once my people were many, now we are few.”
The Muslim then chimed in and said, “once my people were few and now we are many.”
The cowboy looked at the Muslim, shifted the toothpick in his mouth and said with a sly grin, “that’s ’cause we ain’t played Cowboys and Muslims yet.”
The Alliance: New Filthy Lie Assignment - Evil Glenn’s Secret Project
So I get this assignment and what turns up in my email a few days later?
Subject: BUSINESS PROPOSAL
To: mani_family5@yahoo.co.ukDear Sir,
I know that this proposal letter might be a surprise to you, but do consider it as an emergency.In a nutshell,I am Mr. DAGPIN TSNTNU LENI,from the republic of Sierra-Leone in west Africa,now seeking political asylum in Dakar Senegal under the (UNHCR).I got your contact from a reliable chamber of commerce.My (late )father (Dr.MUSTAPHA LENI) was the managing director of Rainbow Gold Diamond Mining company in (KEN EMA) Sierra- Leone.But was killed during the longing civil war and all his properties was totally destroyed.However, we managed to escape with some of my father’s precious Diamonds which is presently deposited safely in a security and finance company here in Dakar.
Now we are saddled with the problem of securing a trust worthy foreign personality to help us transfer the diamonds over to his country pending my arrival to meet with him.Furthermore,we only want this done this way because your country is politically stable for any profitable investment and if you accept our proposal,you will serve as the beneficiary of the diamonds.
I am giving you the offers as mentioned with every confidence on your acceptance to assist us,we have decided to give you 10% out of the total money generated from the sales of the diamonds.Secondly,we shall mapped out 2% for any miscellaneous expenses that you may incur during the transferring of the diamonds over to your country. Finally,the diamond weight in question is 42.550 Carats.Conclusively,i wish you send me a reply immediately as soon as you receive this proposal, so that we shall arrange on how to lift this consignment out of Dakar Senegal to your country.
On commencement,this transaction will take (7) working days to be accomplished.A certificate of ownership, and the Lab-test result certificate of the diamonds would be fax to you immediately i receive your urgent and positive reply.Until then,i remain with the best regards. My alternative email address is (samkalloon_2002@yahoo.co.uk)
Regards.
DAGPIN.
Hmmmmm… DAGPIN TSNTNU LENI, I smell anagram….
I’m watching Diane Sawyer’s interview with President Bush and repeated the uranium from Niger meme, interspersed with a short clip from Bush’s speech. Bush didn’t address anything specifically - answered with David Kay’s report - Sawyer pressed and Bush passed. All he was going to say was Hussein was a danger to our security and he made the right decision.”
Damn. I wish he would’ve stopped her dead in her tracks on the Niger bit, “Diane, the British dossier stated Iraq was trying to aquire Uranium in Africa - there are other countries in Africa besides Niger and the British stand by their report. Get your facts straight Diane.”
Some years ago, Glenn Reynolds was an obscure professor at a University for Hillbillies, UT (this is true), but something happened which flipped him and turned him into the Dark Lord of the Blogosphere (DLB). Something triggered the DLB deep inside Reynolds - something caused him to cease accepting comments and turned his dorky heart black as coal.
Alliance intel has long thought someone’s comments sent him over the edge into the dark abyss, but has had little in the way of solid proof.
Well, I’ve got the proof! After pouring over raw intel from Alliance archives and racking my brain for literally thousands of microseconds, I hit upon the idea that the comments had to be from someone who saw him in person.
Using a complex inverse transmorgifying algorythym and a tin of pickled possum, I hacked the UT data archives, found a bloated spatial anomoly within the deletion core, containing reams of swirling data, trapped for years.
With trembling hands I performed a triple lindy grep, using keywords: ‘Insta’, ‘pundit’, ‘puppy’, ‘blender’, ‘gringo’, ‘jesuit’, ‘milkman’, ‘gypsy’, ‘kibble’ and ‘okra’, finding NOTHING. Not one thing. Then it hit me! A word common to all UT grads! ‘Nekkid’!!! I hit pay dirt!
In response to this post, I found these comments:
I seen y’all steppin’ out and checkin’ the skies. I been watchin’ y’all for nights and days. Do y’alls readers know what you do at night? Durin’ the full moon? Yer readers is sure to go up if’n they knew y’all had a penchant for sippin’ mint juleps and chasin’ critters. Y’all is so cute, leapin’ and hoppin’ after them critters in y’all’s Incredible Hulk underoos! I likes them the best - the green contrasts well with y’all’s pasty white thighs! Thank the good lord y’all wasn’t nekkid! Talk about borealis!signed, a sekrit admirerer (who loves possum too!)
Shortly after this, The DLB was born.
Rat bastages.
Thanks be to Allah for this link: Security Fence Distortions over at Honest Reporting dot com.
Grrrr. Aggggh. I really can’t stand this type of dishonesty.
You’ve heard of this, no? Liberal bloggers and others are hyper-linking the words “Miserable Failure” to the White House web site.
Rather than strike back equally, I up the ante:
Sexual Predator National Disgrace Rapist President
Sexual Predator National Disgrace Rapist President
Sexual Predator National Disgrace Rapist President
Sexual Predator National Disgrace Rapist President
Sexual Predator National Disgrace Rapist President
Sexual Predator National Disgrace Rapist President
So there!
For Clinton supporters who would chastise me for the word ‘rapist’, please read this and watch the original interview, aired by NBC (You need Quicktime). For Clinton supporters who would tell me he is not a rapist because he was never convicted - I think OJ Simpson got away with murder. Just because he wasn’t convicted, doesn’t mean he isn’t a murderer.
I heard about this on local talk radio today - I imagine it is old news, but I thought I’d share it anyway. The artwork is pretty decent, so is the sound - but the voices and animation are somewhat lacking, in my opinion.
From Drudge:
If Gingrich’s premise is true, we are going to lose the long haul in Iraq. The blogger “Formerly known as Glenn Reynolds” - see symbol here - mentioned an aspect of this very problem this past weekend.
The higher beings in the blogosphere (not just the ecosystem) need to bang the drums on this one. We cannot afford to lose because our military bureaucracy is acting like one.
There is such a wealth of information and ideas now, they need to be marshalled into a campaign. GI Bloggers need to help with on the ground experience and specific, targetable problems.
Influential bloggers need to pound those drums!
We simply cannot afford to lose in Iraq and Bush WILL change course if he can be convinced a real problem exists, he has in the past.
Gingrich said it is naive to think we’d get “Leaque of Women Voters” style government in Iraq over night. Imperfect self rule is better than drawn out occupation.
The the thing is, I’m not so sure Gingrich’s premise is correct - what he says the adminstration is strategerizing or doing may not be the case. There is so much conflicting reporting it is hard to tell.
